The TGL fan experience was not mine. But it might be for you

PALM BEACH GARDENS, Fla. — Want to see Tiger Woods in action for the first time this year? Tune in to ESPN Tuesdays at 7 pm Eastern for week four of the second season of TGL Golf, the made-for-TV, nightly indoor golf league.

Woods is not playing but his club, Jupiter Links, is busy, facing the New York Golf Club. (Woods is the owner-operator of the Jupiter club.) You’ll get a chance to see Woods walk back and forth from the turning green at the end of the course to the center fairway at the SoFi Center, off PGA Boulevard, the Highway of the modern PGA Tour.

Or maybe you’re close. (Six million people live in South Florida, plus visitors.) Want to see all this action live? As of Tuesday morning, great tickets were still available for tonight’s contest, starting at $250, through Ticketmaster.

Last Tuesday, I went to watch TGL in its first week of the new year. For the fan experience, I bought the cheapest single ticket available, $189, including (in the fine print) various fees. But not all currencies are diverse. I first went to the valet, where the parking fee was $80, and from there I went to the parking lot, where the fee was $30. The SoFi Center is located on the campus of Palm Beach State College.

I asked the parking attendant if there was another place where I could park for free and enter from there. There was none. “If it makes you feel any better, last year parking here was $40.” Are falling parking fees some kind of economic indicator? Looking at the cars nearby and even in the parking lots, and the bad looks of the people getting out of them, no one was too worried about $10 here, $10 there. As I engaged in small talk with a twenty-something ticket holder from a car parked next to mine, he rattled off various details about the golf courses at Apogee, a new development about 20 miles north of here that has three classes and a short course. “It kills,” said my neighbor in the parking lot.

The SoFi Center was spotless, slightly humid, dead, with limited food items — soft pretzels for $8, hamburgers and veggie burgers for $14 — and all kinds of high-end alcohol. The stadium can seat about 1,500 people and there were hundreds of empty seats. The two teams competing in this first season were the Atlanta team playing against the Bay team, representing greater San Francisco. In the interest of full disclosure, I should say that I have watched TGL on TV, but I didn’t understand what I was watching. I don’t hit balls in the simulator. I’ve never been to Topgolf. I’m not the TGL demographic going here. I went to ABA basketball games as a kid and really enjoyed it. The red, white and blue ball, Dr. J flying with it in the air.

Back then, we didn’t have earbuds. At the SoFi center, you are given a pair, which appears to be a gift for your sponsorship, although you have to provide some information to use it. I spent about 20 minutes charging mine and connecting it to my cell phone. At 21 minutes, I gave up. I could hear play-by-play commentary and player-to-player chitchat through the dedicated channels available on my phone. Among all the other ambient sounds, I was never far from it.

I spent a lot of time watching Billy Horschel, a lifelong Floridian and Gator golfer on the Atlanta team. He always seemed to be doing something and doing it with enthusiasm. I saw him hitting the iron on the big screen in the direction of the electric hole that I couldn’t use, but the swing looked good. Horschel must have felt the same way. As his gun flew through the air and onto the screen, somehow he knew he was right. It must be good. There are no wind storms to worry about at the SoFi Center. He was within 10 meters. Before long, it was time to reverse directions and walk to the turning green. It’s disappointing.

Above, on the roof of the SoFi Center, there are many bright lights. The raucous music (good sound system!) didn’t change, except when the public address announcer offered some sort of insight into the action below, including the ever-present question about whether one or the other teams would be “dropping the hammer.” For the thousand or so fans in attendance, and the hundreds of thousands watching on ESPN and its family of broadcasters, it was, obviously, some kind of minor concern.

You can read all about hammer throwing, TGL style, on the TGL website, and I did. Checking your phone while attending this two-hour, 15-hole TGL event is common. The Hammer Throw is a strategic tool where a team can increase the value of any one hole from one hole to the second. There is more to it than that but that at least gets you started.

The hammer itself is not a hammer at all. Horschel had put in his left back pocket, what looked like a Handi Wipe, sometimes carried by Sunday duffers, to keep clubs and golf balls clean. But you can throw the hammer with a lot of style. Players, by the way, when the team’s uniforms are usually decorated, they get their individual approval. Patrick Cantlay, also on the Atlanta team, had Delta tattooed on the chest of his shirt, Cisco on his sleeve and Apollo on his hat.

Lexi Thompson was in the house as was LPGA commissioner, Craig Kessler. The TGL women’s league is coming later this year. Brian Rolapp, CEO of the PGA Tour, was in the room. Rolapp and his fellow Tour executives have a vested interest in TGL’s success, because part ownership of the TGL team would be another recruiting tool to keep popular golfers on the PGA Tour and off the LIV. Woods owns the league and owns the Jupiter team. Rory McIlroy owns the league, too, and the Boston team, which is owned by Fenway Sports Group, with which he has a business relationship.

At the end of nine holes, the score was Atlanta 4, Bay 3. I can’t say I cared but I was curious to see how the last five holes would play out. I walked out into the wide, uncrowded fairway, onto the short fairway to play one shot on the PGA of America-sponsored simulator, hit a weak putt with a 7-iron into the visible ocean on my first swing of the new year and returned to the course.

Somewhere around this time, “Good Vibrations,” an old Marky Mark song, hit the SoFi Center. Chris Gotterup, the Atlanta fullback, drilled the shot. I think someone threw a hammer at him before he played but can’t say for sure. The final score was Atlanta Drive Golf Club 7, Bay Golf Club 4. I can’t think of a sports league where the founding goal was to make money for the team and league owners, but maybe TGL will be different.

Don’t walk by me. When Topgolf was first described to me, before the first tee, I thought, “Sounds like a glorious driving range.” I thought the same thing about driverless cars. When I got back to the parking lot, I saw for the first time in my life, a driverless car in action. Its owner, apparently, had found a way to get all the benefits of parking without paying an extra $40.

Back in the day, ABA basketball was child’s entertainment for young basketball fans. Serious basketball was played at The Garden, by the Knicks. Knicks v. Celtics. Knicks v. the Sixers. Knicks v. The Lakers. Maybe Jupiter v. New York will one day have that kind of ring. Maybe one day there will be a movie about TGL golf like there is about rollerball. Maybe this whole thing will play out in some glorious way that I can’t see. People need entertainment, and here TGL, provides it. Fun is like everything else. It is in the eye of the beholder. I would like to watch the playoffs from Monday’s four-spotter to earn a spot in the Tour event. But that’s just me.

Michael Bamberger welcomes your comments at Michael.Bamberger@Golf.com